Being Bonnie Vanak

A journey inside the mind of a quirky romance author who travels in the Third World

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

The perfect man?

His name is Steve. He's been featured on ET (not the alien movie) and he's claimed to have spent nearly $250,000 on plastic surgery. Biceps, pecs lifts. Is a pec lift like a breast lift for men? Would you call that a man tit lift? How do you lift a pec anyway? He's been compared with a Ken doll. You know... Barbie's wussy male counterpart.

In my doll days, I stole my bro's GI Joe and had Barbie ride off on her horse with Joe. My Barbie deserved Joe. Ken was too much into competing with her clothing. GI Joe back then was a foot tall. When dolls were men.

Speaking of foot longs... heard on the radio this a.m. that some company is now making condoms just to please South African men. Seems the SA male complains regular sized is too tight. The new condoms accomodate a, um, member that is one foot long and eight inches in circumference. Holy summer sausage, Batman! A FOOT LONG penis?

http://www.bonnievanak.com

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