My night

12:30 a.m.
Me: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
DH: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

RING RING RING!!!

Me: zzzz...uhhuh? WTF?
DH: zzzz...uhhhhh...lo? uh...blah blah blah blah. OKAY. Gotta go to work. Emergency. blah blah blah
Me: WTF? WTF? It's 12:30, blah blah blah, WTF? WTF? WTF?
DH: Bye!

Me: WTF? zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2:30 a.m.
DOG BARKS. DH HOME.

Me: zzzzzzzzzz...uhhhhhh...WTF?
DH: I'm home. blah blah blah blah. Night.
Me: Night.

Dh: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Me: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

5 a.m.
ALARM CLOCK BLARES

DH: zzzzzzzzzz...hhhhuhhhhhhhh...WTF? Oh, F.
Me: zzzzzzzzzz....oh sheesh. WTF? Already? WTF?

Me: Stumbles to patio to bird cage.
PARROT: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Me: Tosses cover over bird cage
PARROT: zzzzzzzzzz...WTF???