Dear Ms. Newsome
I am responding to your email of June 14, 2005 inquiring if I want to:
1) Have erections lasting at least 36 hours, GUARANTEED!
2) Not experience any side effects
3) Boost my sexual performance
4) Have harder erections and "quick recharge" (Am I a battery?)
5) Spend $3.99 per tab
The answer is, quite simply. No.
I do not presently possess the equipment to take advantage of your splendid offer. I must admit though, I find the the idea of walking around with a woody for 36 hours quite fascinating. Perhaps you should advise your clients to seek either medical attention after four hours or hire themselves out as coat hangers at a local homeless shelter if the condition persists?