Sunday, December 10, 2017

Cookie is gone

Cookie is gone. We put her to sleep Thursday morning. She had kidney failure, her creatine was 2.4, her BUN was 111. She also was in heart failure, with fluid leaking to her lungs, and had labored breathing. They did an xray and she had a mass near her stomach. So kidney failure, heart disease and cancer. There was no hope. The vomiting was from the kidney failure, but if we gave her fluids like we do with Holly, her heart would have gotten worse, and her breathing worse. She was in pain and suffering a lot. This is the last photo of her, taken at the vet's office. We held her, stroked her, told her how much we love her. She went peacefully, dying in my lap as we told her how much we loved her. She was 15 years old.
We are a wreck, but slowly healing. Cookie died at 11:15 a.m. on the 11 year anniversary of putting our beloved Tia, our first Shih Tzu, to sleep. I was so hoping for more time with Cookie, but you have to do what is best for the dog. No more pain. No more suffering, cookster. You're running free and happy with our other pups in heaven.
Having a dog means a lot of responsibility and having the courage and strength to do the right thing for your furbaby when the time comes. It is the hardest thing you can do as a pet owner. Cookie was not eating. She would lick a little baby food off my finger and then refused food. She was breathing hard and so much in pain. I didn't realize her little whimpers at night were from the cancer. I would give her tramadol, which she had been on since 2016 for arthritis. We thought her whimpers were from the arthritis. Now we know it was probably the cancer.
She could barely walk, but she had a personality, always loving to eat and nosing around Holly when we tried to coax Holly into eating when Holly was fussy because of the renal disease. I did tell DH that at least I had been feeding her aging care, which is a good food for much older dogs, and helps with the kidneys. HOlly is on the same food. The CKD came on suddenly as she had great numbers Sept. 29 - her creatinine was only 1.0 and her BUN was 33. We did a senior dog wellness check each six months, but in Sept. she went to the ER for a suspected brain tumor. She had old dog vestibular syndrome. We were so happy she was OK and could make it to her 15th birthday. We threw a party for her and invited friends to bring their dogs. It was a wonderful celebration of Cookie's life.

It will take a long time to get through this emotionally because she was a member of our family, but Cookie is at peace now, no more pain, running free in heaven.. 



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